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Jazz Up Those Cheesy Pickup Lines

You want to get the girl! We know it! But what do you seem to habitually fall into? Pickup lines. Dreaded by women everywhere, yet somehow, men just aren’t picking that up. Instead, they’re rehashing those cheesy lines over and over again – and getting absolutely nowhere. To understand how to work an effective line, one first has to understand just what women want to hear.

Understand this, you’re a guy that came out of nowhere, she has no clue who you are (though she probably could guess what you want!), and you have one shot to make an impression. Keeping in mind also, that whether you’re in a public place or a bar situation with another 20 guys eyeing your girl, it’s all very possible that she’s already been hit up before, and rejected them. So what makes you different? How can you come off cool and confident, and not cheesy and lame?

Fortunately for you, mister, the key to good pickup lines or intros, lies in just a little bit of homework. As with online dating, the best way to start a conversation is by reading her profile, so too with real life dating, you start by observing your target.

Where is she? At the bar, at a restaurant, at the theatre, in the supermarket, at the bus stop… There are so many places you might meet a girl that catches your fancy. And tailoring your intro to the environment can really give you some brownie points.

What is she doing, or who is she with? Observing and appreciating what a woman is doing can win you a big thumbs up from her. After all, she probably wants to be noticed!

A bag of compliments, a cup of creativity, a tablespoon of confidence, and a pinch of playfulness – there’s your recipe to a good hearty opener. Try some of these the next time you’re out and someone arouses your… interest!


At the bar…

Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you everyone else disappears.


Hi, my name is (your name) and I’m gonna buy you drinks all night until I look as attractive to you as you do to me right now.

Talk about opening with a bang! She’s got all your attention, and you’re letting her know it. Flattered she well should be! WIN. (Do this only if you can afford the slew of drinks in case it gets to it!)


I like a lady who’s well put together, and has her own sense of style. Have you seen anyone like that here tonight? I’m kidding, I think you’re glamourous (or impeccable!). Drink?


You’re complimenting her (she put a lot of effort into looking like that, acknowledge it!), and you come off as humourous, suave, and a little bit cheeky. WIN.

 


Waiting for the bus…

Who needs a bus when I can just stare at your busts? Get it, get it?



Waiting for transport just got a hundred times better now that I meet you. Hi I’m (your name). Where’re you headed?

It’s a compliment, flirtation and truth all in one! The perfect cocktail for disaster, we mean, a date! WIN. (Just don’t get all stalkery and follow her on her bus and then get off at her stop and…)


In the supermarket…

I love fruit and I must confess, I absolutely love MELONS.



A gorgeous woman wasn’t on my shopping list, but hey, I can be spontaneous. Hi.


Again with the compliments and oozing so. much. charm! You know how they say “You had me at hello?” You’re totally creating that romantic moment for her with this one. WIN.


You know, I make a mean spaghetti and meatballs. Very Lady & the Tramp, I guarantee. Got an hour or two? I’ll whip one up for you right now.

Women can be won through their tummies too, not just men! You cook? You’re romantic? AND did you say you cook? WIN. (You might want to actually be able to cook what you promised though!)


If she’s reading a book…

 Hi, did I tell you I’m writing a book? Yeah it’s a phone book and it’s missing your number.



She dies in the end, you know? Oh wait, sorry, wrong book. What’re you reading?


Start with a shocker of a spoiler (god, do women hate spoilers, have you done it before and actually survived??), then slip in the humour and spark off a convo. She might be so tickled she won’t even remember to bookmark. WIN.

 


If she’s shopping with friends…

I think it’s really nice of you to give your friends style tips but they’ll never be as hot as you are. #justsaying



(aside) I just wanted you to know you have the brightest smile. It’s very contagious. (smile broadly) Wanna go for ice cream some time and turn our smiles into laughs?

Compliment, check! Cheekiness, check! Date, check! WIN.

 

Well there you go. The next time you get the hots for a hottie potatie, don’t dive into your bag of cheesy liners and pull out a It-must-have-hurt-when-you-fell-out-of-heaven. Spice it up with a little intelligent design and a whole lot of classy bravado! Or, if all else fails, just go with “You're so cute that you made me forget my pickup line!” Good luck! ;)

  • July 20, 2017
  • Kelvin Won